Clothing Identity?

What you wear will often say more about you than you ever could.

Clothes and the like have become the markers of our tribes, of our identities. We are not what we eat, we are what we wear.
To that end the business is forever seeking to give form or tailor to the identities of markets the world over.

I will present a selection of categories for consideration...

The Hipster
(Could I have started with anything less)

Note the retro/bad taste vibe. The rejection of a perceived mainstream. The desire to be different, but not that different. What was once laughable or worthy of scorn becomes a marker of originality on the hipster.

Hipster fashion runs on a simple logic wheel...

The Mainstreamer

Often claiming to be a non-participant of clothing identity wars, the mainstreamer is nonetheless making choices. Their choice is to be largely invisible. Present but not overly memorable. Social appreciation is achieved rather through an attachment of wealth or value to the clothes they wear; the more expensive, the more elitist and important they feel.
Such individuals are indeed prone to ostentatiousness.

The Minimalist

Minimalism is not dead. It's still quite awesome.
The minimalist will limit their clothing to the holy triumvirate; Grey, Black and White.

By their very nature people who show their identity through such clothing choices are not flashgits. Rather they have a sense of style without chasing the latest cool. They have settled into a timeless elegance that can only be achieved through control. Striking statements can still be made, but efforts are better saved for being memorable through simplicity. Think Audrey Hepburn in Breakfast at Tiffany's

The Heavy Metal Fan

I refuse to term this group bogans. Being a bogan is having a behaviour. I have known many metal heads who were calm, restrained and intelligent. You're more likely to get arrogant mainstreamer bogans than you are metal heads - it's just that the metal sub-culture is more visible.
Borrowing from many of the sensibilities of minimalism in regard to colour application, Metal fans generally limit themselves to Black.

Metal fashion is about being uncompromising. It's a rejection of trying to dress how you're expected to. This rejection is genuine to the point of attracting scorn from those that have never listened to an Iron Maiden or Pantera album.
Contrary to widespread opinion I think the Metal look can be powerful and striking in a good way when well executed.

Less hair, more attitude; it works.

The Goth

Included as a stand-point to metal, but nonetheless a notable trend of clothing identity.
While the regular Goth look is indeed rather hard to pull off in most, Goth fashion stands as the ultimate in not caring about what others consider of your appearance.
However, it has inspired some looks that are rather commendable. I stress the use of the word inspired there...

The Post Modernist
Where anything goes because it's all a concept.
As long as it's breaking down traditional ideas or concepts in relation to clothing then almost anything could be considered post-modern, but I include this category to that fashion can result in some truly insane creations.

Any girls willing to wear a pair of these?

Seriously?

Or how about this; a futuristic French aristocratic update on the clothing of the flying nun...

Cool, but crazy.

So, you are what you wear.
Where do you fit?

UPDATED: coffees and what they say about you

It's a post-modern, robot-eat-robot society - you're gonna be judged, so you might as well judge others.

Stereotypes are there for a reason - here's a straight forward cheatsheet for judging people based on what they order from the barista:

BLACK COFFEE DRINKERS

Probably minimalist, austere and direct people who don't tolerate frothy, sugary, colourful beverages (or people).

FLAT WHITES / LATTES

A bit more mellow, less austere people who are a bit warmer and more approachable.  They may not have the strange allure of the edgy angsty types, but they are probably nicer people to deal with.

FROTHY CAPPUCCINOS, OR COFFEES WITH HAZELNUT/CARAMEL/VANILLA SHOTS

Like the coffee, the person is probably bubbly, and diabetes-inducingly sweet.  They drink coffee solely for the social, clucky aspect of catching up with their Bridget-Jones friends. They are approximately two decades away from the stiff gins and Dido CDs.

VENTI TRIM SOY GREEN TEA CAPPUCCINO WITH HALF STRENGTH HAZELNUT SHOT WITHOUT CINNAMON AND WITH CHOCOLATE SPRINKLES INSTEAD IN A SPECIAL TAKEAWAY CUP

Tragically misguided people who believe the more customised their beverage is, the more cultured/interesting they are. Fussy for the hell of it, even though they can't even tell the difference when it comes to the coffee. The non-alcoholic $11 liquid they are holding in their hand is a statement, in a beverage form.

ORGANIC SOY CHAI LATTE

Secretly wishes they drank actual coffee, and uses a moral high-ground or lactose intolerance as an excuse.

HOT CHOCOLATE/MOCHACCINO WITH 3 SUGARS, EXTRA CREAM WITH MARSHMALLOWS. OH - WITH TRIM MILK PLEASE. (Thanks Matt)

Bitch please! - the only thing getting thinner is your wallet. We get that you're trying to lose weight, but unless you're running a marathon on your next break I'd start by not drinking a meals-worth of calories in a beverage. 

Eh, whatever helps you sleep at night fattie.

fonts

As a minion of post-modernism, I type everything I do.


Whether it is pressing the physical buttons on laptop keyboards, or tapping away at the screen on my iPhone, typing has replaced handwritten work.

As a consequence, the skill of having beautiful handwriting reflective of your personality and your emotions has become moot - all 26 characters look the same no matter who types them, or where they are typed in the world.

Fortunately, the post-modern gods of supply and demand have not left us in the lurch with the clinically sterile Arial and the stodgy Times New Roman, with the explosion of fonts and typefaces available today.


I like to think of typefaces as the post-modern response to personalised and emotion-conveying handwriting.

We may not write everything by hand, but we have millions of fonts to choose from, many of them being free - just search 'fonts' and you will find entire websites dedicated to them.


Here's an overview/refresher (click for the larger image):

Fonts: USE THEM.

Proper Use of Some of Our New-Speak

Language is de-constructing.

Whole sentences are being condensed into acronyms that are then being made pronounceable and being formed in new words. The rules of spelling, grammar and intelligent written sentence structure are being voided literally as we speak.

Yes ladies and gentleman, a universal new-speak is being created right from our own mouths.

The source and driver of this butchery of all the rules you were taught at school; our un-friend The Internet. Aided and abetted by the Text Message.

This post is going to examine a few of the more notable developments and how they should be properly employed;

FML

Pronounced: "Ef-em-ell"

Source Sentence: Fuck My Life.
Cultural Source: Single serving story site http://www.fmylife.com/
Proper use: Not for anything average or lame, FML is reserved for only the most tragic and disheartening moments in your life. Using it on the mundane will make it lose its power.

ROFL


Pronounced: "Rof-ill"

Source Sentence: Rolling on the Floor Laughing
Cultural Source: An offshoot of lol, most likely born in the murky depths of MSN and online chat rooms.
Proper use: An appropriate response to a funny joke or story where a user wants to convey their appreciation of humour beyond just a simply lol.

Lol, Rofl, and Lmao are all closely linked, and arguably indistinguishable in actual practice.

PWNED


Pronounced: "Owned"

Cultural source: A competitive computer gaming typo that has gained significant recognition through the Pure Pwnage Canadian web-series - http://www.purepwnage.com/home_outside
Proper use: Whenever you are able to dominate another in a competitive sense. Simple, brutal, triumphant.

Taking New Speak too far can result in trouble. You risk sounding like an 11 year old girl if you get carried away...



To which there should only be one proper response.

how to make the best of your misc hour

The best way to describe misc hour is to describe what it is not.


It is not the busy rush of the morning, it isn't the bustle of the afternoon.  It isn't the winding down of the evening either. 

It lies in-between the last hour at work, where things slow down and time begins to play tricks on your mind, and the time when you have arrived at your next destination and you are busy thinking about dinner, social functions or the preparing for the next day. 

I think a great opportunity is lost here - take a moment to mentally extract yourself from the hoards rushing to public transport and take stock of the world you live in.

Grab a seat at a streetside cafe, order a beer or a nice coffee. Savour the drink, while sitting back and watching the masses rushing to their next destination. People are at their most honest when they're pre-occupied, and it's interesting speculating where they might be heading to.  

Make the most of misc-hour.

Why the Internet isn't your Friend

The internet isn't your friend, so quit expecting it to be kind to you.

Sure it may be where you can trade, bank, communicate, research, stalk strangers and be entertained. But your usage of the Internet is only a slim slice of the pie.

In truth, the Internet is vast and uncaring. The Internet is discomfort, danger and disagreement downloaded and dispersed in an indispensable form.

The Internet couldn't care less about you unless your upset reactions were somehow entertaining.

In our post-modern faceless society the internet is the easiest place to be mean to total strangers, as best illustrated in the "Greater Internet Dickwad Theory"

Maybe you've asked yourself by now; "But who out there is the cause of this potent mix of apathy and cruelty?"
The answer is; those younger than you - but specifically those sociopaths still young enough to think they're funny.

What can you do to stem the flow of hurt feelings you feel whenever someone does or says something you don't like?

Petition to take away their free speech?
Grow a thicker skin?

My recommendation; stop thinking the Internet is here to hold your hand and serve you.
It's not.
The Internet is here to serve everyone; and for some that means it's here to humiliate and mock you in a public manner from a-far.
Be careful what you do or say, because the Internet trolls are lurking for their chance to strike...